Tuesday, July 31, 2012

PostHeaderIcon Bryce's Bathrooms Across America Part II

Oh, the glamorous places we stop at. Only made a total of 3 restroom stops during the 9 hour trip. Not too bad, but some of the places we stopped at were...

Georgia Interstate Rest Area (Around Exit 38)
Rating: 2
I walked Bryce to this bathroom while Vance sat in the car with the baseball bat. Yes, I brought one of Vance's baseball bats to whack the snot out of any crazed person who might attempt to take over my vehicle. When he got out he reported...Mom, there was a guy in there BRUSHING HIS TEETH IN THE NASTY SINK.
Me: Well, he could have been a trucker and was just cleaning up.
Bryce: Well, maybe. Some other guy was in there wetting and combing his hair. The toilets were rusty and gross. I should have went in the woods.

Well...that almost happened.

Cracker Barrel - Georgia I-95 Exit 36A - Yeah 2 Exits down from the rest stop
Rating: 7

Bryce: It was pretty good, although what's the deal with the toilet paper dispenser thingy. It was so low, I had to reach way over to reach it. Every time I reached over to get the TP, it automatically courtesy flushed on me 2 times!!

Blanton Express Citgo - In the middle of nowhere Florida
Rating - a surprising 8

Bryce woke up from his coma sleep and immediately said he had to go to the bathroom. Oh come on, really?? We were at the point where the exits weren't easy on and off the interstate restrooms. The sign said 0.7 miles. It was way longer than that. Nothing town like in sight. I asked if he could please just go on the side of the road and he insisted he really needed a real bathroom. Ugh... I told him he has 30 seconds and if the gas station didn't show up we were turning around and of course at the last second, there it is. It was looking really scary. Completely rundown looking, very back woods. Not quite Deliverance, but close. We pull up. The 2 employees are standing outside the entrance talking. The only 2 cars there. I sent him in alone.....I know, that was probably bad, but I was annoyed and tired and fed up with total random downpours to drive through every 30 minutes. I watched the woman employee walk in for a moment and come back out and talk to the other employee. I was ready to jump out with the bat if needed. I was about to send in Vance and out comes Bryce smiling and gets in the car.
Me: Well, everything okay?
Bryce: Awesome, that place was an 8. It was so clean, it smelled like Pinesol. Believe it or not they had a hand air dryer (guess that is a top priority). I was really surprised when the toilet flushed easily.
Me: Why was it an 8 then?
Bryce: On the wall it said "Bleep you".
Me: Bleep you?
Bryce: You know what I mean. A curse word, like your car talk.
Me: Oh, great. (Then I notice he has 2 suckers in his hand.)
How did you get money to pay for those?
Bryce: Oh, I didn't buy them. The lady gave them to me. She said she only gives them to the kids she really likes.

Banjo music starts to play........

Saturday, July 28, 2012

PostHeaderIcon Bryce's "Bathrooms Across America"

  You know the feeling. You're traveling, on the road, kids screaming at each other in the car, and someone has to use the bathroom. You tell them to wait. Another 10 minutes pass and now they're about to burst in the back seat. You see an exit, a building...is it a restaurant, a gas station, someone's house? You don't know and normally if you have boys you just pull off on the side of the interstate and open the doors and let them do their business on the side of the road. You know how you do it, if you want to be discreet you open the front and back door and they stand in between them so you can make yourself feel better even though the passerbys can still figure out what is going on. If you have girls, or you have to go yourself, this is not the best option. So there's that dilapidated business in the middle of Timbuktu.
   Have no fear, for now you'll have the latest summer version of "Bryce's Bathrooms Across America". Well, what is that? It's Bryce's observations and ratings of random restrooms on a 1 to 10 scale. A 1 is a "Might as well have gone in the woods" to a 10 "5-Star, might as well hang out a little bit longer". Well, maybe not America, but he's probably hit most of the east coast. Oh, and lots of areas in the south. Why, because for as long as he has been potty trained, my youngest child has to go to the bathroom at every restaurant in the Midlands of SC. He has made me stop at friend's houses on Halloween while trick-or-treating and pretty much clog up their toilets, been to restaurants where the men's room has TVs on the walls (he said that might be a dangerous idea b/c someone might not pay attention and go on the floor). We are getting ready to venture to the Gulf Coast of Florida next week, so I am sure we will have many stops along the way. Until Monday, here's Bryce's current review.

Groucho's - Sparkleberry Lane, Columbia SC


In Bryce's words...
The bathroom was pretty good. They need to get a new hand soap dispenser because when you push it the handle flips all around. They also need to get a new trash can. The lid was on the floor all the way by the toilet. I picked up the lid and put it back on though.
Me: Why did you pick up the gross trash can lid?
Bryce: I don't know. I was just trying to be neat.

This from the kid who is my germaphobe partner in crime. Bryce must of liked this bathroom because my husband had taken him to eat, and 2 men had to go use the women's restroom because he was taking so long. The manager was going to get the key to unlock the door when Rodney finally decided to tell him Bryce was in there. I asked why didn't he say something earlier to the other men, and he said it was entertaining to watch them try to figure out if someone was still in there.

About Me

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Tina S.
I am a transplant Yankee mom who moved down to South Cakalacky and married a true Southern boy. A few years ago we have moved to what I consider the "boonies" and now I live in my own private wildlife preserve, or at least it feels like it! The puppy you see is now a full grown beast. Enjoy our tales of livin' in the good ole' South.
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Source of the Sagas

Source of the Sagas
Vance and Bryce